Beauty Heals
In 2010 there were a series of major earthquakes in Christchurch New Zealand where I was living at the time. As a result of that earthquake many people lost their homes, their loved one’s and their peace of mind. Thousands spent the following years fighting insurance claims.
I too spent six years fighting an insurance claim. As a consequence of those experiences wrote a blog and 2 editions of a book (The Christchurch Fiasco: The Insurance Aftershock and Its Implications for New Zealand and Beyond and The Insurance Aftershock: The Christchurch Fiasco Post-Earthquake 2010-2016) in support of the many thousands of people who were struggling.
Perhaps you’re wondering what this has to do with art? Actually quite a bit. Through art I coped with those very difficult times. It takes incredible strength and determination and a survival strategy to get through such a long and emotionally draining process. Art in the form of writing and creating, is what kept me going for those long six years. During the precious moments I had when I wasn’t preparing for a high court trial, or arranging expert visits or talking to other earthquake insurance affected citizens – I got to creating.
In the early days I wrote The Christchurch Fiasco (1st edition) and then later wrote The Insurance Aftershock. The research took up much of my time. It took my mind off the incredible struggle affecting so many in Canterbury. After the book, came the public talks and interviews and a year later I found myself still face to face with the problem of my own insurance claim. It was so tough at times that I simply had to find ways of distracting myself. Miraculously though my body seemed to know what to do, seemed to know how to find a way of coping. I found myself furiously creating again.
In the process of the creation of art I was able to master, tolerate and minimize the conflict and stress. It equates to not much more than self distraction I guess. My art work became prolific. Yes, art therapy is a well known methodology for coping with stress.
It has been an unconscious process- it has been my physical self’s way of surviving, of protecting my mental self. Despite how much energy I put into expressing my anger and sadness my creations remained items of joy and beauty. In that beauty which illuminates what I am creating – comes healing. It was a way of overcoming the dualism in this painful process. A way of obliterating the negativity and darkness I experienced while dealing with the insurance industry. I was surprised by my own output. It flowed through me and out of my fingers. Creation after creation after creation. In the year following the earthquakes, art began to appear everywhere. Perhaps that was no accident – all expressions of people trying to cope in whatever way they could. And what a wonderful way to cope.
So what did I make? I made handmade fabric ‘hope boxes’ and the space around me slowly filled with my ‘hope’ boxes. The boxes represented for me, the ability to compartmentalize. A place of storage for my resilience. While I painted, stitched and sewed, my mind calmed, my thoughts focused on what I was doing and the disruptive world of dishonest insurance disappeared for a time. I later made water colour paintings of the work I had created.
During those years I made artistic representations of the Canterbury Cathedral, of the Cardboard Cathedral, square shapes, hexagonal shapes, pyramids and the list goes on (see photographs)- items that were so removed from the world I then inhabited. These items of colour and texture brought me peace, solace and great hope – hope that one day the situation would be resolved for every Canabrian affected by the events in Canterbury and that my family and other families might be able to move on with their lives.
Each of us finds our own way of dealing with stress – exploring and relying on my creativity is mine. Throughout those years I noticed my tendency to disengage from my social circles, to withdraw to lick my wounds on my own. In creating my art forms I connected with a deeper space, the true essence of myself, a place I inherently trust, in an environment where trust often seemed very hard to find.
Now 14 years on from those tragic events I want to acknowledge the many claimants in Canterbury who still have unresolved claims – or are dealing and living with shoddy repairs – for many these years will represents the battle of a life time, an extraordinary loss in personal freedom and financial equity.
I hope for all those who find themselves in similar difficult and trying situations that you remember that you have other resources, a universe of beauty, that you can mobilize in order to survive, and prevail – just give it a go!
Happy-Arting!
Sarah's Art Diary 